


Can't you see I like muffins?

by indignantpup



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Bottom Kim Yugyeom, Cheating, Eventual Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluffy, Jackson is in love with Jaebum, Jaebum is awkward as hell, Just wanted some Yugbum, M/M, Miscommunication, Rough Kissing, Sexual Tension, Shy Kim Yugyeom, Soft Im Jaebum | JB, Top Im Jaebum | JB, Yugyeom have trusting issues, i don't really know where this is going
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-10-30
Packaged: 2019-05-18 13:36:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14853785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indignantpup/pseuds/indignantpup
Summary: Kim Yugyeom is an exceptionally busy college student that doesn't believe in love anymore, not after his ex-boyfriend cheated on him for four years. Now he lives working and rejecting every attempt Jackson Wang has tried to make to have sex with him. But for how long can he ignore the true meaning behind this obsession? Yugyeom knows Jaebum likes him, but will he keep denying their obvious attraction?(I can't write summaries, sorry, I tried)





	1. Chapter 1

Whenever Yugyeom woke up in the morning, he would take fifteen minutes to breath and just look at the ceiling to avoid thinking about his life. In those few moments he had with himself, he allowed his mind to wander far away from the problems, the college work, the work and away from Jackson Wang. Ever since he started college two years ago, he got in the same classes as this obnoxiously loud and happy-go-lucky chinese. Not that they had a problem in the beggining, but all started to go to hell when he made out with a hyung with sharp eyes and rough personality in a party he went when he was a freshman. He was drunk, heartbroken and honestly, that night he just wanted to feel human skin, feel someone touching him and actually enjoy the sensation. Bitterness started to well up and he covered his eyes with one arm, laughing self-deprecatingly at himself. He ended up thinking about that bastard again.  
Arriving at the big campus after a short walk from his tiny apartment, Yugyeom was sure his day would be terrible when he had the misfortune of seeing Jaebum, the guy he made out two years ago, waiting for him in front of the class. He couldn't possibly understand what he did that day to make the guy crazy in love with him. Maybe the older was trying to get an easy fuck, but if that was the case he would stop going after him when Yugyeom flatly and very rudely turned him down the week after their make out session. Maybe he just was crazy in the head, or judging by his explosive personality, the man needed to have whatever he thought was his. Or couldn't get over someone who said to him "no". More so if that no was so faithfully said.  
Yugyeom sighed in annoyance and went quickly towards his usual desk, not even sparing a glance in the other's direction. Jaebum scoffed with indignancy and chased after him.  
"What the hell, Gyeom-ah? Now you are being rude to your seniors?", he spit out, glaring at Yugyeom who just casually started to spread his materials in front of him, drawing some design draft.  
"You were just standing outside of a classroom, hyung, you could be here for anyone and it's not like I care", Yugyeom answered, not batting an eye "besides, I need to finish this draft before tomorrow and don't have the time for your bullshit today".  
Jaebum threw his head back and sighed in exasperation by the other's answer "I can't believe you right now. Do you sincerely enjoy seeing me like this? Who else would I be looking for here? You know that I want to see you. We need to talk".  
"We always need to talk in your pertubed mind, hyung. Why don't you just give up ?", Yugyeom snapped, closing his notebook harshly and glaring at the older "I just told you I don't have time for you bullshit today, so, if you would be so kind to just go away". He looked back at his material, not trying to draw again.  
If Yugyeom looked at Jaebum's face right now, he would visibly see the hurt and disheartened expression he wore.  
"Sorry, see you later...", and with that, he disappeared down the hall, not looking back.  
Yugyeom felt a little sorry for the way he treated Jaebum, but this was the fifth time he tried to start this conversation and it was fucking friday. But not when he was going to spend his entire weekend trying to finish his essays due monday, no way in hell.  
The only thing he didn't expect, however, was that Jackson was seated at the back of the classroom all the while he had that little sour exchange with Jaebum. And that meant Yugyeom was going to go through hell after class.

When the lesson was over, he didn’t wasted a minute to get his things and rush out of the classroom, but, much to his dismay, Jackson followed up with his short legs, screaming “wait”. Yugyeom could notice from his tone of voice, what Jackson was going to say: “Want to go somewhere after class?”. And pretty much that was what he said when he reached Yugyeom near the cafeteria. Yugyeom just sighed, closing his eyes to try and ignore him.

“Hey, Gyeom-ah, let’s go have some coffee, I want to spend time with you”, the older insisted, clinging to his arm. 

“Hyung, you know I have work, I can’t go even if I wanted to.”, he said, happy to have the perfect excuse and dismiss Jackson. 

“I know you have work, that’s why I said we should go get coffee! You work in a café, right?”, the boy grinned wildly, as if knowing Yugyeom couldn’t refuse him.

“Well, I’ll be working, so you’ll really just have coffee by yourself.”, Yugyeom added, tiredly “Let’s just not do it at all.”

Yugyeom knew why Jackson wanted to go “somewhere together”. It was because the chinese was madly in love with his friend, Im Jaebum. The same Im Jaebum that was in love with Yugyeom and yet again tried to convey this fact today. And now, because Jackson had a distorted mind, he wanted to bed Yugyeom because in someway that would make him near Jaebum. Or whatever shit he thought made sense. At that point, Yugyeom was so tired of rejecting Jackson and running away from Jaebum that he caught himself thinking “why not?”. If he let Jackson fuck him, he could go and tell Jaebum that and any person with a little self-respect wouldn’t chase after him again. 

So when Jackson started whining and pushing his arm, wanting attention, Yugyeom stopped, looked at him with total seriousness and said “alright, let’s do it. When I’m finished with work, you take me to a hotel and we get it over with”.

Jackson was so flabbergasted that for a whole minute he just stood there, looking stunned and opening and closing his mouth like a fish. 

“What? That’s what you want, isn’t it?”, Yugyeom snorted, taking his arm out of Jackson’s grasp “I’m saying I’ll let you do it.”. And walked away, leaving a gobsmacked Jackson behind. 

 

That evening, when the cafe was near the closing time, Jackson indeed showed up, looking strangely nervous and fumbling his fingers around. Yugyeom regretted his choices in life then and there, hoping to just go home and forget why he decided that it was a good idea to have sex with Jackson. He didn’t went to bed with anyone since breaking up with his ex, and now he was going to have an one-night stand with some random dude. Not that he didn’t knew Jackson, he actually knew him good enough to know that was a terrible mistake and he should just tell him he was joking and go home. But Yugyeom didn’t want Jackson to know he was afraid and had worries about relationships and the warmth of other people. Definitely didn’t want to show Jackson how he longed to be touched with care, to feel good being in his own skin.

"Let's go", he then said, to hide his true feelings.


	2. Right Placement

Right now, Yugyeom was trying to think of something to say to Jackson when they got to the sleazy motel they were able to afford. The air was tense and lacked the welcomed sexual tension that prepared two guys and spelt who was going to ride the dick. Not that Yugyeom really cared who was going to dick who, but being in complete silence all the way to the motel and all the way to the tiny bedroom made his stomach flip in an uncomfortable way. Jackson was a handsome guy, though he was a lot shorter than himself, and the boy had a crazy hot body that just made him feel even more nervous when the older started to strip down his clothes, still silent. The scene was so surreal that Yugyeom cringed despite himself. He felt nobody was in command in that situation, what shouldn't be a problem if there was mutual trust or feelings involved. The big problem here, it was the complete lackluster reaction of their bodies. At that point, Yugyeom started to feel like his dick wouldn't get up at all, though he would feel personally offended if Jackson wouldn't react and just back out of this sorry peonage. 

"So, ahn, how do you want to do it?", Jackson asked matter-of-factly, grabing some condons in his wallet tossed on the bed "I mean, I've never been eaten before, and don't know what your preferences are", he added while letting his clothes fall to the ground in front of the bed. 

Yugyeom wanted to die, so mortified he was. It occurred to him that he never went to motels to have sex-based relationships, if he could call this, that. He didn't even know if this thing would be recurrent or if Jackson just wanted to possess Jaebum's object of interest to heal his longing. He caught himself thinking that he didn't really know the guy standing in front of him. Yeah, Jackson was loud, cheerful beyond tolerable, always running around flirting with everything that moved, but he doubted the guy was only this flirtatious cliche. Rather, maybe he would change completely the moment Yugyeom would say which role each was playing here. Really, being bottom seemed safer than suggesting Jackson Wang to get on his fours and give his hole to him. Jackson throughly appeared to be those super dominant male alphas that needed to have his wishes granted and feel the power of making another man kneel in front of them, begging to be fucked silly and completely tear down at the end, with flushed cheeks and a trembling body. In some way, Yugyeom thought of giving him exactly that and try to forget this experience the quickest way possible. As he thought this, Yugyeom saw Jackson watching him closely, observing the impression Yugyeom had of him. And, as though fear weren’t quite ready to release its hold on the youngest, he had the brief wild idea that maybe this was not emotionless sex at all, but a trap meant to lure him into the false belief that Jackson was a normal person, a person like him, hiding his insecurities behind charming smiles and flirting with him to smother down the awful feeling of a discouraged love.

"I can be bottom", Yugyeom murmured while averting his eyes to the bed, "I mean, I intended on it from the beggining...", he added when Jackson crumpled his eyebrows in quiet concern. 

"Okay", the chinese answered, not warning Yugyeom when he walked two steps forward and smashed their lips together in a chaste kiss, pawing at his chest to take out his clothes, just like that, without any sort of preparation or suspense. 

Yugyeom immediately felt the disconfort prickling his skin, shrinking his shoulders invonlutarily while his body was pushed to the bed, and he fell disgracefully with a surprised gasp. Any kind of daydream he had in the back of his mind, which he would use to maintain his mind occuppied while letting Jackson have his fun, went down the drain. Now he felt exposed and weak, not in control of the damages. But the thought of what it would take to stop what he had set in motion was overwhelming; it would require an amount of tact and gentleness that he felt was impossible to summon. It wasn’t that he was scared Jackson would try to force him to do something against his will but that insisting that they stop now, after everything he’d done to push this forward, would make him seem spoiled and bratty, as if he’d ordered something at a restaurant and then, once the food arrived, had changed his mind and sent it back.

But when the oldest went down to lie above him, with sloppy and open-mouthed kisses, pressing their crotches together with only the thin cloth of their underwear, Yugyeom began to have trouble breathing and to feel he wouldn't be able to go through with this after all. He closed his eyes tightly, trying to imagine one of the hot actors he was a fan of, all the while trying to ignore the warm sensation of their skin touching and the rushed and rough way Jackson's hand went to grab his dick, taking it out of the underwear and immediately masturbating him. Then Yugyeom noticed Jackson was hard, panting in his mouth while they clumsily kissed. This realization gave him such a high level of astonishment, that a perverse thought ran through his mind: he was in control, not Jackson. And hearing the low growls from the other, Yugyeom started smiling and decided to take the iniciative, tantalizing the chinese with sultry muffled sounds, enjoying the sensation of Jackson's body trembling above him. He then crept his hand to Jackson dick, massaging it so slowly that he could feel the bulge actually start to pound in his hand. The hurried jumbled kisses were now slowly transforming in the teasing pecks and nibbles that made Yugyeom feel so good and carried away, that the fantasy of showing Jackson how he was sexy and beautiful and how that was exactly why Jaebum couldn't forget him after just a short session of make out two years ago, made his ego go so high he actually started to get aroused. He wandered why he refused this feeling, when it made him feel so powerful and special, like he was different than other boys his age. He wasn't just a brat that couldn't have one-night stands because of awkwardness. So he let himself kiss Jackson breatless, just because he could, and took off their underwear while moaning in Jackson's ear. 

The older boy was so lost in all that sexual atmosphere that let out his sweet and grave voice, earning back high-pitched whines from Yugyeom, who very promptly opened his legs to let Jackson's dick travel between his legs to poke at his hole. And then Yugyeom woke up from that franzied reverie. Because all the preparations he done to mold their arousal was pointless when Jacskon couldn't hit his hole. The frustration made the older boy curse under his breath, separating their lips to look down at their bodies. Yugyeom looked at the ceiling, and he knew that his last chance of enjoying this encounter had disappeared, but that he would carry through with it until it was over.

"Where the fuck...", Jackson started, and to end this, Yugyeom forcefully groped Jackson's thing and shoved it inside him, not letting the sinking feeling in his stomach stop him. The next few minutes he closed his eyes, feeling his revulsion turn to self-disgust and humiliation that somehow kept the brusque movements going until he felt his body respond in awkward resignation. 

And then it was over, and Jackson fell to his side on the bed, completely exausted, and Yugyeom had the urge to jump out of there, put his clothes on and disappear from Earth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it guys, I'll be posting more tomorrow or after this week. Sorry if it seems a bit abrupt, but that's the intention to prepare for Yugbum relationship. See you~ (I'll check later for mistakes, so bear with me a little)


	3. That Hipster Cinema

Yugyeom was looking at his reflection in the hazy old mirror stuck inside the bathroom box he was currently in. He just stood there, looking mildly tired while droplets of water fell in his body. Jackson was in the room next to him, laying in the bed where they made sex not long ago. The experience was not something he would be remembering fondly in the future, nor he could imagine it would be sufficient funny for future stories he would tell his children. 

He sighed another time, trying to look at the good side of this mess: Jaebum would find out he and his friend fucked, and finally accept Yugyeom wasn't going to be with him in this lifetime. But for some reason, that didn't help him feel better about himself. For some reason he didn't know, knowing that he did what he did just to hurt Jaebum and make him forget about this crush, reminded Yugyeom of the cold way his ex treated him, and how that was the exact way the guy decided to upbraid the fact he was tired of Yugyeom, to get rid of him. 

After the bath, Yugyeom still felt dirty and sticky, even though he brushed his body so hard there were marks all over his arms. Putting his clothes back on, not waiting for his body to be completely dry, Yugyeom opened the door and saw Jackson typing something on his cellphone, and when he thought it could be Jaebum, and that Jackson was reporting the news to him, Yugyeom inhaled sharply and felt a sting in his chest. Then he shook his head and picked his wallet and the key to his apartment, saying a curt bye to Jackson, who tried to say something but was interrupted by the loud sound of the door being closed. 

In the way to his house, Yugyeom two times considered calling Jaebum to explain why he did what he did. But then again, why should he? It's not like they were together, he said no to the other so many times he started to wonder if Jaebum just had a serious case of amnesia. The rain didn't help, soaking his already damp clothes and making him feel horrible and disgusting. Seeing his house was a tiny confort he appreciated, soon entering and leaving the pieces of clothes fall in his way to the bedroom. The place was simple, but had the warmth of his old parents' house; full of little plants and trinkets adorning every corner of it. Yugyeom felt that was the only place in the world where he was safe, the only place he could sleep soundly and not be afraid of seeing people he didn't want to see or face his problems. And right now, this comfort brought him some peace of mind. Showering once again, changing his clothes to soft cottom pyjamas and making hot chocolate with marshmallows in his favorite Moomin mug, Yugyeom finally could breath and rest his mind easy.

Nothing was passing in the tv, not that Yugyeom noticed, staring blankly at the soap commercial airing because he couldn't forget the awkwardness of the night. Everytime he got distractred, glimpses of Jackson's moaning voice and the sound of flesh against flesh in the silent room came back to his mind, torturing him until he slept messily in the couch. That night he dreamed Jaebum and Jackson became a couple.

 

It was so hard looking at Jaebum's eyes when the boy entered the cafe Yugyeom worked, that the youngest wanted to drown himself in the water of the coffee machine. The black-haired, skinny and built boy had this savage feeling about him, with sharp eyes and adorable two dots in his upper eyelids; He used to dress in all black and wear a bunch of earings in both ears, gaining this bad-boy vibe that made all girls in college talk about him. Yugyeom soon thought he was the type of guy whose parents were strict and that's why he ported himself like some sort of gothic older brother with an attitude everytime you didn't obey him. And that didn't clash well with Yugyeom's bubbly and rampant personality. He did have an older brother, so he just wasn't affected by the guy. Maybe that was why he sparkled an interest in Jaebum: because he wasn't impressed by him, not allowed the older to boss him around like he did with everyone else.

Today, however, Jaebum took a different approach: he didn't try to start a conversation with Yugyeom; the guy just went to the counter and ordered a coffee, black. Yugyeom eyes him suspiciously and made the order, looking in every direction but the older boy. Jaebum was paying close attention to his phone, like Yugyeom didn't exist and this made the youngest think that Jackson probably told his friend about their night rendezvous yesterday.  
While the coffee was brewed, Yugyeom couldn't help stealing a few glances at Jaebum and then averting his eyes, straightening up the cups in front of him nervously. After he was done, Jaebum paid him and went to one of the tables, sitting and opening a lot of notebooks. From that distance, Yugyeom knew that Jaebum was now writing lyrics. The older was a movie major and also part of a rock band, what Yugyeom thought matched his style, or maybe it was the reverse. 

They were in the company of each other, though not talking, for almost three hours when Yugyeom's shift ended. He went to the back of the cafe to change his clothes in the employee area and came back to find the black-haired boy waiting for him. He was going to roll his eyes in annoyance, but today he was relieved; Yugyeom thought that he was a spoiled brat, only caring about the guy when he saw he could lost him. Maybe he just wanted to feel better because he fucked up and didn't deserve the pursuing. In anyway, he went up to him and crossed his arms in a defensive posture before saying a hesitant "Hi".

Jaebum smiled, notably surprised by the iniciative and answered with a heartfelt smile "Hi, good morning Yugyeom-ah. You don't have classes this afternoon, right?", he asked, though Yugyeom had the feeling he already knew he didn't.

"No, I don't have classes", he answered anyway, waving his hand when the other part-timer arrived hurriedly and went behind the counter, "Do you need something today, hyung?" "Ah, actually, yeah, but it's not something urgent... You see, I need to watch this movie in that hipster cinema that opened and I was wondering if... If you would like to go with me. I need a layman's opinion to write in my report.", he said calmly, chancing a look at Yugyeom. Yugyeom was took by surprise, not sure if this request was true or just an excuse to go on a date with him. But if the older still wanted to try to gain his affection after the thing with Jackson, he realized that Jackson probably didn't tell anything to Jaebum, and that knowledge made him feel a mix of relieve and guilt.

"Sure, let's go... You just need an opinion for college, right? So if I need something, you owe me one", he decided, showing a placatory smile. 

"Of course, that's all I wanted", Jaebum responded with a dazed expression "That's all".


	4. Popcorn with Ketchup

Since Jaebum had already bought two tickets for the movie - fact Yugyeom kept in his mind, because that seemed like a cautious plan, - they decided to walk to there, talking about college and innocent stuff. Yugyeom tried to see what the older was thinking, but the goofy expression in the other's face just left him feeling slightly jitterish, smiling to himself without meaning to. He realized he didn't know anything about Jaebum other than the guy was kind of punky rock and liked movies. But turned out Jaebum was more than that, showing his interests subtly with a smile or a cute frown depending on the topic of the conversation. Yugyeom learned he was a softy, having three cats he seemed to love very much, showing pictures and smiling brightly when talking about them. Also, he lived with a roomate, a friend that nagged him because his room was a mess; Jaebum liked to wear loose clothes, and prefered confort over style. He likes photography, and used to take hipster photos to post on Tumblr, which he admitted with a cute shy expression, averting his eyes. 

That time together made who was Im Jaebum change drastically for Yugyeom, and he caught himself having fun with someone for the first time in a long while. Usually he felt disconfort around people, always afraid of saying something he shouldn't, because he tended to annoy others with his jokes. Jaebum was his hyung, so he didn't like when Yugyeom was too informal with him, or made jokes about him, but even so, seeing the older punching him in the arm with an indignant smile, Yugyeom felt like that was only possible because they were getting close, forming a bond. And then he stopped his thoughts.

What right did he have being all happy and giggly with the guy that just yesterday made him want to be hit by a truck? Not to mention the hurt-sex-scheme with Jackson just SOME HOURS ago. Yeah, Yugyeom was a little shit. He cursed under his breath when Jaebum looked at him worriedly and asked if everything was alright. Maybe they could be just friends, why he should worry? Jaebum wasn't his boyfriend. 

"Did you know Jackson-hyung likes you?", Yugyeom uttered before he could stop himself. 

"What? That came out of nowhere, Yugyeom", Jaebum said with a surprised expression and frowned his face, speaking seriously "Yeah, I know. He told me. A lot of times... But I can't feel anything for him, so we're just friends now...", he stated with a gentle tone of voice. 

Yugyeom felt so bad about the question, thinking about the night prior and the sincere way Jaebum treated Jackson's feelings that he wanted to apologize then and there. But he didn't felt like de could. He always treated Jaebum's feelings like shit, because he didn't believe the boy was interested in anything other than his body, like some wild animal that couldn't take no for an answer. And now the disgust he felt yesterday was coming back, creeping in his skin like muddy water and he felt dirty and unworthy.The face of his ex came back in his mind, scratching memories he wanted to forget. "Yugyeom-ah?", Jaebum called, and Yugyeom snapped out of his thoughts, alarmed. "Huh? What?" "We arrived, do you want popcorn?", He asked, looking concerned. "Yeah, sure...", Yugyeom floundered, glancing down at Jaebum with a strained smile. "Ok, so... You go wait in the line and I'm gonna buy it", he said gently, trying to reassure the anxious younger "I'll be right back", he said, sauntering to the other side. He wanted to give Yugyeom some space, and he noticed it, feeling better for the solitude; he always could think better without prying eyes. Yugyeom tried looking to the movies in theaters and it was relatively effective. After a short time, he saw Jaebum come back with two popcorn sacks and a big soda, which made Yugyeom unconfortable thinking about sharing it. "Here is yours, with extra butter!", he announced proudly, giving Yugyeom the sack with strong yellow popcorn and fished the tickets in his back pocket. "What about you? No extra butter? I'm not giving mine", Yugyeom said cheekily, holding his sack close to his heart. Jaebum scoffed resentfully and responded with a smile "I never said I wanted, I have all I want right here", he pointed to his own popcorn and for the first time Yugyeom really looked at it. He scrunched up his face in disgust when he saw that the popcorn was covered in ketchup. "What the hell? No! You just ruined one of the most delicious things in the planet!", he pointed accusingly to Jaebum.

"I'm not! It's the best way to eat popcorn! You are so common, eating it with just butter!", he laughed loudly, earning a few glances their way.

"Yeah, what next? You eat fries with chocolate?", Yugyeom laughed derisively, arched brows in irony. 

"I do, actually, you should try", Jaebum answered straight faced, and after a surprised moment of silence, both started chuckling until they sat in their sits, reenacting each other's expressions. People looked at them funnily, they heard hush signs during the trailers, but kept on laughing. Yugyeom might never have laughed so hard in his life. The movie started playing and it was boring and silent, just like how a cult movie should be, so Yugyeom (more interested in Marvel hero movies) soon started drifting his attention to Jaebum, and he really seemed to love eating popcorn dripping with ketchup which was strange as hell, and really cute; the way his tiny expressions went from surprised to concentrated or the little giggles he let escape when a joke was playing; he just was really expressive, if you cared enough to see the details. And Yugyeom saw them all. Now he was really starting to feel like Jaebum was a whole different concept and that scared him, because Yugyeom wasn't supposed to allow someone in his life so easily. The scenes in black and white were mocking him, spitting to his face his cowardice to trust people and live trapped in a colorless world. Yugyeom ate his bright yellow popcorns, looking at the red ones from Jaebum, and just for a while, he allowed himself to be swept up in that moment, enjoy feeling the slight warmth from the older's body next to him. Yugyeom looked to the side and moved his head down to slurp the soda, chewing the straw because of sudden nervous antecipation. He didn't know why, but he felt like Jaebum would kiss him, and he remembered the rough and sloppy kisses from that make out, and he didn't remember well how was the sensation. He wanted to find out, feel that inviting and enticing tickle in his body without the mistness of the alcohol. So, when he looked up he permitted himself to marvel in Jaebum's heated, endless dark eyes, closing slowly his own to allow Jaebum to move forward and touch their lips together. The sensation was like floating, Jaebum's lips being warm and moist just enough to give Yugyeom the taste of how wonderful it would be to open his mouth and let the older make a mess out of him. But unlike the other time, Jaebum wasn't in any hurry, touching his lips with such gentleness that Yugyeom felt like he was something really precious, and he wanted to cry, to tell everything, to forget everything and be with this guy, to disappear. When they parted slowly, Yugyeom felt that wasn't enough, not even close, and the overwhelming feelings clashing in his head let everything become too umbearable. "Excuse me, I'm... Going to the bathroom", he stated with the lowest voice and rushed out of there, but not before he could notice the scared hurt in Jaebum's eyes. He didn't go to the bathroom; he ran away, crying because of the taste of ketchup in his mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if it's too rushed, everything will be slow when the others start to appear in the next chapters, so hang in there!


	5. Cute Donuts

Yugyeom kept on going until he reached Mark's house. He ringed the doorbell and prayed for his hyung to be there, to welcome him with open arms and soothing voice. Mark Tuan was the brother Yugyeom always wanted; they knew each other since Yugyeom was too young to walk alone, and since their families lived in the same street, Mark, who was four years older, was responsible to walk hand in hand with tiny Yugyeom to the kindergarten that was inside their school. After that, they were always together. Yugyeom was a shy kid, so he had difficulties making friends with other children, and mostly stayed alone, so Mark grew to be overprotective and had a habit of spoiling Yugyeom, giving him sweets and chocolate and doing basically anything he wanted. 

After so many years, they still were close, moving to Seul together when Mark started college and Yugyeom was in highschool. They lived in the same house until Yugyeom enrolled in another university and moved out for practicality. Mark opened the door of his run down duplex and his expression brightened up the moment he saw his adored little brother, opening his arms with a big smile and hysterical voice, engulfing Yugyeom - who was much taller than him now - in a warm hug, messing the younger's hair while asking about his health, college and life.

Yugyeom embraced Mark tightly, trying to swallow his tears, but the conforting feeling he felt with Mark made his walls collapse and he started crying in the nook of Mark long neck, and at the same time Mark sadly smiled and started patting his back "There, there... It's allright, honey...", with a voice so kind Yugyeom just cried hard, feeling overwhelmed. 

They went inside, Yugyeom still glued to Mark, and he kept embracing the older while Mark prepared some hot chocolate with marshmallows for his dongsaeng. After some minutes, they were nestled closely in the bright orange ludicrous couch Mark bought in the flea market; they sat silently, Mark petting Yugyeom's hair, a fond and worried look in his face, letting the boy rest and feel at ease. He was used to seeing Yugyeom break down like this, ever since the thing with his ex abusive boyfriend, so he didn't ask questions, nor tried to make the other feel better with pointless cheer up sentences; he just stood there, offering a shoulder for Yugyeom to cry on, without judgments or pressing for answers. That was the Mark way of dealing with things, since he himself was a quiet person.

"I'm a horrible person, hyung...", Yugyeom muttered after a while, sinking his face further in the blanket they were rolled up.

"You're not horrible, Yugyeommie... You are the most kind-hearted and thoughtful boy I know...", Mark whispered sweetly, caressing the hair near Yugyeom's ear like a cat "And I know you for how many years? You are hardworking too...", he continued, and Yugyeom just wanted to deny it all, say he was a spoiled brat, egoistic and unfeeling, mistreating people who didn't deserve it. Instead, he just cried quietly in Mark's arms, letting himself be spoiled for the crybaby brat he was.

After some hours, Yugyeom cried until he slept, all shrunk and trembling from the cold. Mark eyed him sadly, rubbing his back confortingly and sighing now that the other wasn't seeing him. Mark always worried. Yugyeom's parents were kind and happy-go-lucky, just like their child, but at the same time, they always lacked perception to notice how fragile Yugyeom was. The younger worried too much about money, because Yugyeom's parents used all their savings to send his older brother to the States, and left Yugyeom with nothing. That's why Yugyeom worked himseld to exaustion everyday, and though he didn't like to study and wanted to pursue dance , something he loved since he was a child - Mark remebered how little Yugyeom would catch his hand and guide him to the long table in the living room and dance up there Chris Brown songs with a smile on his face - he studied hard to get the partial scholarship in design and made it. Yugyeom worked part-time to pay for his university, and worked freelance for magazines and publishing companies to pay the rent. That's why he didn't know what to expect for each month. He could very well be without a job and starve, because that happened before, and Yugyeom didn't ask for help nor told his parents. He endured life all on his own, without many friends to support him, and now Mark wasn't able to watch over him, and everytime the boy came to his house crying, his heart broke a little.

Mark sent a quick text to his kind of boyfriend, telling him he couldn't go to the show with him, asking him to apologize to his friend, and continued to pat Yugyeom.

Yugyeom didn't wake up until the next day, when the sunbeams stretched all the way over to the couch. He opened his eyes blearily, looking up to see Mark curled up against him, and he hesitated to leave that warmth.

"Hyung... Wake up... I need to go to work", he whispered gently into Mark's ear, and the oldest groaned, tired, and let him go.

"Take my coat before you go, Yugyeommie... It's cold outside", he slurred, pointing to a bright yellow coat with donut prints that was way to ridiculous to wear to work.

"Don't you have another one I can use, hyung?", Yugyeom complained, looking at the donuts with a grimace.

"No, there is not. Go or you'll be late", Mark grumbled back, and after a quick look to the loaded clothes basket, Yugyeom sighed and unwillingly dressed up - thank god Mark's clothes were all bigger than him - and went out.

It was cold, and Yugyeom was thankful for Mark's thoughtfulness when he puffed along the way to work, bracing himself from the cold. He marveled on yesterday's events, his mind wandering to the vision of Jaebum's eyes, full of love and longing, his tense body before their lips touched sweetly and when he ran away, hurting Jaebum yet again. He shouldn't have gone. Somewhere in his mind, he knew this would happen. But he wanted to. He wanted to kiss Jaebum, to perhaps hold onto some kind of hope the older wouldn't hate him after he find out he had sex with his friend.

Everyhing was a mess and Yugyeom forced himself to stop thinking about it, hurrying to his work like his life depended on it. Soon he saw the cafe, a cozy little place hidden below a hair salon that smelled of avocado conditioner. It was good for bussiness, because all the time the girls from the salon went to get a cup of coffee after polishing their nails or styling their hair; Yugyeom didn't enjoy the attention very much, but he was used to the light flirting and phone numbers the clients gave to him, and when he saw himself alone, he would trow it all away in the trash bin. 

Today he was alone the first shift, so he was responsible for opening the cafe and preparing the beans and hot water and receiving the pies and cakes brought by a cute and sweet guy named Youngjae; he was one year older and had the brightest smile just like the sun, and Yugyeom always wondered how someone could smile so fully so early in the morning.

He was used to this routine by now, opening the cafe, saluting Youngjae, that always came in the same time, and they would chatter about trivial things while Yugyeom arranged the pastries in the balcony. Yugyeom learned after some while that Youngjae was Mark's hoobae in college, after the older saw the picture of Mark and Yugyeom smiling together in Yugyeom's phone.

"That's my sunbae! Do you know him?", he asked.

"Yeah, he is my hyung, I know him since forever", Yugyeom explained, smiling, remembering the loud laugh and deadpan expression Mark had, the duality too much to handle, and then Yugyeom asked innocently "And how do you know him, hyung? Mark-hyung is a lot older than us".

"Oh, that... I met him when I went out with a group of friends, and he was there too. Then he started hanging out with us", Youngjae explained, somewhat tensely.

Yugyeom thought that was very odd. Mark sure had friends and hung out with them, but he never heard before of Youngjae.

"Well, do I know someone there?", he inquired, jokingly, and Youngjae tightned his expression, compressing his lips in a thin line.

"Since you know Mark-hyung for so long...", he murmured to himself, and decided that it was ok, and then continued, "Mark-hyung talks about you a lot. He is always worrying and showing us photos of you, that's why I kind of felt at ease in your company... But Jinyoung-hyung gets so damn jealous that he stopped", he added, trying to hide his scandalous laugh.

"Jinyoung?", Yugyeom parroted, trying to remember where he heard that name, but then it was time to open the cafe, and Youngjae said goodbye and hastily made his way out, saying he stayed there for a long time.

Yugyeom was left with that eerie feeling in the pit of his stomach. Why he thought Youngjae was so guardade about talking of his group of friends? And Jinyoung... He sure knew this name from somewhere. After a lot of thinking and worrying, he decided Jinyoung was a common name, and resumed his work.

It was chilly and everytime someone opened the glass door, the little bell tinkled and a breeze spun Yugyeom awake. He was alone in the cafe for a brief time and so decided to wipe the mismatching tables before someone arrived, but his wishes fell short when the tinkle of the bell rang above his head. He looked up with a big smile, ready to welcome the new customer, but then he lost all sense of bearings. Jackson was there, looking grim and confused, and trailing right behind him, stood Jaebum, looking unfazed; Jaebum was wearing a big hoodie and loose jeans, and he looked so soft just then. Yugyeom's heart constricted in his chest, and for a moment he forgot how to breath; the memories coming back all at once.

"W-welcome...", he started, feeling dazed and nauseous.

"Oh, Yugyeom! How are you, hard at work? Me and Jackson here just want a cup of coffee, black, please", Jaebum politely requested, not batting an eye.

Yugyeom was stunned into silence, and nodded with a trembling smile, going behind the counter to turn on the coffee machine. He thought about a lot of things, and his head hurt. The smell of coffee was usually conforting, but now Yugyeom felt suffocated, like he was drowning, and his entire body felt numb and tense. There was this unsettling feeling in the air, with the careful and calculating stare Jaebum was giving him, and Yugyeom swallowed the lump in his throat, feeling restless and cold.

"Here it is.", he said, or at least he thought he said, his lips too dry and his mind too hazed to really undestand his surroundings.

"Thanks, Gyeommie~", Jaebum suddenly fixed his dark eyes on him, showing a shift smile that didn't seem right. Yugyeom felt this inkling, his skin crawling with disconfort so strong he wanted to throw up. He wasn't sure why he felt like Jaebum's smile was some sort of test, maybe to see what he was going to do.

Yugyeom was a coward, so he ignored this wrong pulsation in his heart and handed the plastic cups to them. Jackson took his and averted his eyes, but Jaebum's touch lingered when their hands touched. But unlike that time in the movies, when he felt warm and fuzzy, now Yugyeom felt dread, like something unknown was trying to catch him.

"By the way", Jaebum started, chipper, an easy smile now plastered on his face, ending whatever tension Yugyeom was feeling; that didn't stop his anxiety he just wasn't sure what the other was going to say, so he guarded himself, "cute donuts", Jaebum sang and showed Yugyeom a bemused smile.

Yugyeom felt sick to his stomach and the way Jacskon was so quiet was strange. Just then he realized he was trembling, and he didn't know why.


	6. Trenchant Kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for this.

Jaebum felt angry. He didn't like the way Yugyeom flinched when he walked into the cafe. Jackson was dead silent and Jaebum just then had a clear vision in his mind, as if he could read the other two mind. He knew Yugyeom and Jackson had done something; Jackson was flirting with Yugyeom, and Jaebum knew he did that because he wanted to feel powerful, to feel in control over Jaebum in some way. He wasn't disturbed by this, because until this moment he was sure nothing would happen, because Yugyeom knew as well why Jackson flirted with him. And now, he felt this quiet, cutting anger and he trained his eyes in the youngest, seeking to undress and uncloak this barrier Yugyeom put around himself; he didn't want to wait anymore. Not when his gut feeling was screaming that something had happened between the two of them.

When he invited Yugyeom to the movies, he was confident he could take his time, show the younger he truly cared about him and wasn't only after his body. He wanted to talk to him, learn about him, and then share his love for movies, music and who knows, maybe invite him to his upcoming showcase, and present his friends to him. But everything went to hell when he couldn't stop himself from kissing him; Yugyeom's lips were plump and inviting and Jaebum didn't think, he just wanted to feel what he felt two years ago. But now he knew he screwed up, when Yugyeom ran away from him, and now, maybe Jackson won, and the youngest was out of his reach.

Thinking about all that, Jaebum was consumed by a pressing in his chest, a churning sensation that risked to spill and he didn't trust himself right now. When they got out of the cafe, Jaebum looked to his right where Jacskon stood uncharacteristic quiet and clenched his jaw, trying to control this gnawing in his chest.

"So, when do you plan on telling me, Jackson? What did you do with Yugyeom?", he said, voice dangerously low. Who saw Jackson could literally see his droopy puppy ears at hearing the anger in his friend's voice, and he sipped his coffe nervously, cowering inside his jacket, "Jackson, don't make me beat the shit out of you! What the fuck did you do with Yugyeom?!", he said, elevating his voice a little and closing in on the shorter boy.

"Look, we just... Made out, or something...?", Jackson answered unsure, darting his eyes around and looking like a kicked puppy.

"Or something? What the fuck is wrong with you? You know I like him! I've liked him for two years now! I know you think getting close to him will in someway make me like you or whatever, but-"

"No! Don't say it! It's not like that! I didn't go after him because I thought you would give a fuck about me, I know I have no chance! I just wanted to feel something!", he explained, stuttering when Jaebum gaze kept impassive. 

"Fuck that, you wanted to feel something with the guy I like? What kind of friend are you?! You know very well why I can't let him go!"

And Jackson knew. Jaebum was once famous for being a womanizer, going out with different girls every night and fooling around together with his band mates. One-night stands were so normal to him that you could think the guy was a prositute. Jaebum, in the beggining of his career in music, always liked to bounce about how the girls wanted him and would open their legs for him even without him asking. Yeah, he was know to be the worst kind of heterosexual there was, the loathful, cocky asshole who was sure nobody would ever turn him down and then it all changed when he met Yugyeom.

He went to this freshman party to see if there was any cute chick with big boobs he could bang, and was walking around telling the new kids to prepare themselves for the hell that was college, and the brutish parties they would go, and when he passed his arm over a bony guy, who seemed scared shitless of Jaebum, and started to prod about how life in college would change those little sheeps, he heard. He distinctively heard the snort, coming from one of the freshmans: one broad guy seated in the far corner of the table, gulping down whisky and looking at him with an unimpressed smile, mocking Jaebum for all he was. He never felt so insulted before, seeing this teenager laughing at him like he was better, and with all his drunkness, Jaebum went to where he was.

"What are you laughing at, you clown?! Huh? Are you looking for a fight? I'm older than you!", he spurt, glaring down at the other who mantained his arched brows.

"I'm sorry, hyung, I just thought that college really will be hell knowing that we have to put up with obnoxious assholes that find it funny to bully other people. You are pathetic, you know?", he spat the words, looking at Jaebum with clear disgust in his eyes.

Something in that look smacked Jaebum right in his chest. He wanted to yell at the boy, grab him by his leather jacket and tell him to shut the fuck up, because he was a nobody, he just got to college and thought he knew better. But then he noticed how the guy seemed to have this resigned derision in the way he laughed, the way his lips curled up like he was so used to this shit that it didn't affect him anymore. Jaebum imediate thought was that this guy might have been a lonely person; he wasn't talking to nobody since the start of the party and kept to himself, downing whisky shots like he was drinking water. He felt this sadistic urge to go up to him and make him kneel down, make him tremble and apologize and run away. 

But when he started to say his discurse, the guy simply got up from his chair and went away, exiting the bar through the back door. 

"Leave him alone, JB, he's just a kid", one of his friends told him, knowing that glint in his eyes.

"I'm not gonna do anything, man, relax! I'm just going to catch a smoke outside and be right back", he answered, not even looking at the guy. Jackson was there, talking animatedly with a bunch of girls, but he saw the smug smirk Jaebum was wearing when he followed a tall and broad black-haired kid outside. He knew Jaebum would beat him up, so he just averted his eyes.

Jaebum quietly trailed after the tall brat, waiting behind a pole outside the bar. The younger llighted up one cigarette, but he just kept staring as it burnt, the ashes falling dently and the smoke rising in front of his face. He had such a melancholic look, seemed lost in thoughts far beyond that day. And then Jaebum felt entranced, like he was seeing an old painting of a decaying man. The boy looked so worn out, as if just living and breathing was crushing him, and in that moment he saw the bruises in his skin; his neck, the little piece of flesh exposed underneath the thick and heavy jacket, there it was, like a drop of paint that spreads on water: the red, purplish blots, wrapped in yellow-green lines, blemishing and shameful, teeling untold stories hiding behind those glassy eyes. 

At the time, he didn't even think. In his haze, Jaebum stretched his hand out, gently, and touched with his fingertips the tainted skin in the other's neck. The boy turned his head, with a subtle expression of fear and longing, and Jaebum felt his heart hurt so much he barely could take it. The lingering warmth in his fingers tingled and the sensation went all over his body; he didn't know what he was doing, but looking at the hazel, sad eyes of the boy, he was drawn, like a magnet, and stopped his face mere milimiters away from the long, high nose of the youngest.

"Who did this to you?", he asked quietly, voice trembling from contained anger. He didn't get a response, just saw as the boy closed his eyes, tantalizingly and slow, and pucked up his lips, so sweetly and sorrowful Jaebum lost his breath. 

It was as if his body just naturally responded, and he met the guy's lips, kissing for the first time someone of the same sex. He didn't felt disgusted, but rather, he felt like the warmth was burning him, releasing waves of such wonderful pleasure throughout his skin that he pressed their lips harder, biting open his way in the other's mouth. Jaebum's heart was stammering painfully and he closed in, rocking his body forward to trap the tall kid in the wall. He earned a sugary moan, feeling the faint breaths escaping between their mouths when their lips disconnected for a second. 

"What.. Is your name...?", Jaebum asked between kisses, sliding his tongue in when the boy tried to answer. "Yugyeom", was what he heard, and the name sounded so sweet, said by the honey like voice whispered weakly, and he felt an unconfortable tightness in his pants. 

Yugyeom opened his mouth, letting the other attack him with his tongue, agressive and needy, and moved his arms around Jaebum, clinging to him desperately. Jaebum was so turned on he was overwhelmed; he just wanted to do that guy hard and brutish, and hear the intoxicating moans coming out of Yugyeom's plump and moist lips. He ravished him, snaking his hands under the black t-shirt the youngest wore and scratching the scorchingly hot niveous skin; Jaebum then started trailing down all those ugly bruises in Yugyeom's neck, and bit hard his collarbone, pulling down the jacket that fell to the ground. 

Yugyeom started rubbing his waist against Jaebum's, moving in a way to put friction in their erections together, and the older growled hungrily, sucking the soft skin above Yugyeom's nipples and grinning when he heard the muffled moans coming out of the boy, who was biting his shirt to keep from being louder. Soon their lips met again, Jaebum exploring Yugyeom's mouth with such intensity the kisses became sloppy and wet, turning him on even more. When Yugyeom started to lose voice, too hoarse from the constant moaning, he whimpered quietly when the older's hand went to grab his butt, stroking roughly.

Jaebum was so lost in the moment he didn't saw Jackson arriving, nor did he realize the look of sheer shock on his friend's face, hurt visible in his eye. When he noticed him, he let go of Yugyeom so quickly the younger boy fell to his knees in the ground, panting and all flushed, with disheveled hair and clothes. Before Jackson could utter a word, Jaebum grabbed the chinese's arm and dragged him out of there, listening to Jackson's frantic talking and doubts about what the fuck was that.

"Look, it was nothing, ok?! I just wanted to give him a lesson and did it! Beating him up wasn't going to solve anything with that lousy mouth", he gave excuses, breathing with difficulty and trying to forget his pulsing cock. Jackson sure didn't believe that, and was so full of thoughts that he just kept on walking side to side. 

While they went home, Jaebum too livid to speak when Jackson started to comment again about the issue, one thought assolated the hetero Jaebum's mind. He wasn't so sure about his sexuality at the moment, because he never felt such intense desire for someone before, and the honey like voice of Yugyeom panting near his ears and the way the youngest pushed their hips together in a frenzy kept coming back until he slept that night.


	7. A cup of tea for anxiety

Yugyeom was so shaken by Jaebum and Jackson's appearance in the cafe he barely made through the day, looking down at Mark's donut coat. He blinked heavily, feeling that known anxiety consuming him again. There was a reason he didn't want to involve in a relationship with Jaebum: he resembled too much his last boyfriend, and the memories were still fresh in his mind. He wanted to believe Jaebum had changed; since Jaebum told him he liked Yugyeom, nobody saw the guy goofing around or flirting with anyone other than him, and even if many thought Yugyeom should feel flattered, he was only disgusted and annoyed for all the unwelcomed attention. But he couldn't deny the desire he felt, and he knew he was weak, he knew he wasn't a confident person and would end up being in an abusive relationship again, because his past mistake wasn't enough of a lesson. That's why he resisted so much the tentation, he couldn't prove what being with Jaebum would be like. He knew that in the beggining everything would be sweet, the sex would be amazing, the inicial possessiviness would feel like a compliment, but eventually he was going to be trapped, feeling unworthy and insecure until Jaebum got fed up and started beating him up and cheating on him with more interesting guys. And knowing how weak he was, Yugyeom would put up with it, because he needed to hold onto some confort, some teensy little bit of affection sometimes, because he needed someone who needed him.

He didn't want to feel like that again, so he ran away from it all. Yugyeom was feeling stressed and after his shift ended, he found himself seated behind the stairs of the univeristy building, moping until he decided he would transfer and start again his life somewhere new and far, maybe go back to his parents house; he should give up his future and spend his life working in a supermarket forever. Not that the idea was so bad, it was a peaceful life and the chances of finding another gay in his hometown was nearly zero. But he felt bad for Mark, for the sure dissapointment he would feel when he discovered Yugyeom was a coward. Yugyeom was a coward: he didn't want to go back to his psychologist and didn't want to depend on medicine to feel numb; rather, he wanted to acomplish something, and moving away might open new doors for him, maybe he could find a better job. But he knew those were excuses he was giving himself. Maybe he should just date Jaebum, maybe Jaebum really was different and would treat him well, maybe he wouldn't get tired of him and go back to liking girls, maybe they could be happily ever after and marry in a small church full of dandelions. But maybe was too strong of a word, and Yugyeom hated it.

So when his intern turmoil subsided, Yugyeom went to class and pretended everything was okay. He could feel the stare in his back, after all, Jackson was a little ways behind him, and certainly would approach him when the class ended. It was okay, nobody should know they had the worst nightstand of the century, and Yugyeom wanted to forget as soon as possible. The bell rang signaling that the class was over, and the teacher asked for the second draft of the assignment next week, and the youngest looked across his table to see Jaebum coming towards him. Has he waited throughout the entire class?

But Yugyeom didn't want to know, he wasn't ready to face both Jackson and Jaebum at once, so he decided to just confront his fears and be honest with the latter, grabbing his things from the table and stuffing his bag before getting up and walking to Jaebum. The older boy looked like death, with big dark circles under his eyes and the rest of his face covered in a black mask. "Hyung, can we talk?", Yugyeom asked politely, even though he was already reaching out to drag Jaebum away, until they reached a more secluded area. Jaebum was stiff as a rock, and didn't say anything when the youngest took them there. It was not easy to start this conversation, and for a moment, Yugyeom wanted to give up his life again, because he felt he didn't possess the kind of gentleness and sincerity to tell this guy he had sex with his closest friend. Hell, he wasn't supposed to justify himself, he was a free young man and shouldn't give any explanations, but he wanted to. Maybe his ego wanted to test just how much Jaebum loved him, if he was going to turn into a beast full of hatred and love and attack him, or if he would beat Yugyeom up for making him a fool.

"I know you and Jackson made out", Jaebum suddenly said, waking Yugyeom from his reveries, "and yes, I'm angry as hell, but at the same time, you and I don't have anything so I don't have the right to say anything.", the boy continued, looking serious and mature.

Yugyeom was honestly flabbergasted; he wouldn't ever consider this turn of events, and was expecting a full outburst and jutted jaws. But then he remembered how soft Jaebum could be, how understamding, even though he was an asshole before. He wasn't - or was trying hard not to be - this shitty abusive violent guy, and something in Yugyeom cracked. Because now he was fully aware of how things could be simple if they just _talked._ But now he needed to tell him he didn't just make out with Jackson, he went for the full meal course, and was terribly sorry for this.  

"We had sex", he said, almost as if his tongue slipped, mouth opening without his consent, like his mind wasn't in full control anymore and just let out his thoughts. He looked around at the garden they were in, full of crumpled flowers and naked trees, because it was that time of the year, and Yugyeom felt the cold and still air for the second time that day. He looked at Jaebum again, trying to fathom what could be going through his mind, and when he saw the _hurt_ in his eyes, he regretted ever allowing this to progress this way. He never really gave Jaebum a chance to talk, to get closer, or even to just be friends. He just ignored him, replied sassily, walked past. But he was scared and the other should know why.

Jaebum didn't respond. He threw his head backwards and snorted. "Yeah, I should've known", he spat with so much disgust Yugyeom's legs failed.

"Hyung-"

"Save this. You finally got rid of me", he said, voice trembling, and took two steps back, turning around and walking away.

Yugyeom was left feeling like the worst person to exist, and his eyes threatened to tear up. His body shook, and he crouched until his body ached, shivering from the sudden cold. He needed to go home, needed to breath again; how people breathed?

Yugyeom decided it was better that way, of course, things never would've work out between him and Jaebum, and he had the afternoon shift at the cafe shop again. So he forced himself to breath, brushed the dust from his clothes and held the air in, almost choking because of the force.

"It's alright... It's alright...", he repeated and went to his work.

 

 

Mark was finishing his review for the upcoming test next week when his phone screen lit up with a message.

**pepi_jy**

Hey, hyung

Have you finished studying? Let's go eat something

**markie**

Hi Jinyoungie! Yeah, wait just a minute

Where are you?

**pepi_jy**

I'm near the entrance.

**markie**

Ok, I'll meet you there

see u soon :)

 

The boy couldn't hide the smile that came to his face, he was starting to be hungry and grumpy after all that studying and couldn't think of a better way to spend lunch then to harass Jinyoung. He gathered all of his things and went sauntering to meet his almost kind of boyfriend. Things were ambiguous between them for a long time now, but as of late, they were even chummier than normal. Mark remembered what Jackson said one time "just get a room at once", because apparently Mark couldn't hide his feelings all that well. Except Park Jinyoung was as dense as wall and thought Mark saw him just as his dongsaeng. Mark was reserved, but even he was loose around his friends, and except for Yugyeom (and sometimes Jackson because he looks like a puppy) Mark wasn't someone to be clingy and affectionate so openly.

Jinyoung was waiting at the entrance, like he said, wearing his usual button-up shirt and tight jeans, looking all serious and smart with a pair of square glasses. Mark smiled at the sight of him, speeding up and waving his hand.

"Jinyoungie!", he called, noticing the younger typing eagerly something on his phone. He looked kind of grim, and Mark started to get worried. Jinyoung was younger then Mark, Jackson and Jaebum, but somehow he was the most mature one of them all, nagging and acting like a worried mom over everything, "something happened? You don't look too bright", Mark queried.

"Ah, it's Jaebum-hyung... The guy he likes, you know? The one he always talks about. Apparently this asshole had sex with Jackson and now Jaebum is brokenhearted and crying to get drinks... I'm worried he will do something stupid", Jinyoung answered, finally looking up to meet Mark's eyes and smiling a little bit.

"Should we go have a movie night in my house? He can get drunk there", Mark suggested, opening up their chat group "this idiot is suffering because of a guy who clearly doesn't deserve him", he sighed and linked his and Jinyoung's arms "let's go have some coffee, I need something to wake me up. There is this cafe where my Yugyeom works and they have the perfect omelet".

"Alright, if that's what you want. Am I finally going to meet your protegee?", Jinyoung smirked.

Mark was kind of overprotective about this Yugyeom, whom he took care since the boy was little. So he always talked about him to the guys, but because he didn't want to be a bad influence - Jinyoung snorts - he always kept Yugyeom away from the others.

"He doesn't need to start drinking and going to pick up boys in obscure bars. He is a good kid and I want him to focus on his studies", Mark always said whenever the topic Yugyeom started in the conversation.

Jinyoung was curious for a long time, and now finally Mark was willing to show his adored little brother to him, and he knew the chance wouldn't come twice. So when he entered the tiny and cozy cafe, he kind of expected to see a small, cute guy with a bright smile, but in the balcony only stood a tall, broad and glummy guy that was so pale Jinyoung immediately thought something must have happened to him.

"Hey, hyung. I think this guy seems-"

"Yugyeomie!", Mark exclaimed loudly, hurrying up to the guy Jinyoung was eyeing, "what happened, honey? You look as white as a sheet! Why the hell are you working looking like this?!"

Jinyoung went there as well, thinking it was a relief no clients were in the cafe right now, but that kid surely didn't look good and Jinyoung got worried.

"Are you sick?", he asked, seeing the guy look up from the counter and look first to Mark, who was fumming and worried, then to Jinyoung.

"No, I'm... I'm just tired", he mumbled, extending a hand to Mark "it's alright, hyung...".

"The hell it's alright! You look as if you'll pass out at any minute! So don't give me that shit, what happened? Is your manager here? I'm going to ask him for you to leave earlier".

"No, hyung, please! I need this money and I get paid in hours of work... I'm really fine, just light-headed because I slept in the couch, it's no big deal", the taller boy answered, chewing his lips nervously at the end, just like a child getting lectures from his mom.

Jinyoung just stood there not knowing what to do. He finally had met Yugyeom, and he didn't look like the cute fluffy boy Mark talked about, rather, he looked way older than Mark and Jinyoung; a tired look on his face, complexion though strong and defined, the guy almost wasn't noticeable for how he ported himself, all shrunk and small. Yugyeom was naturally very pale, but if his blood-shot eyes were any indicative, Jinyoung knew he was crying not too long ago. He pulled Mark's sleeve weakly, as if telling him to back off for a moment, because the youngest was starting to shake a little.

"Yugyeom, right? I'm Jinyoung, Mark's friend, and it's nice to finally meet you", he said more spirited, trying to end that heavy mood "Mark is a little stressed out because he was studying all day, so don't mind him!", he offered a small smile to Yugyeom, who seemed to relax a little as if being saved "but you don't look so well. When your shift is over, come home with us, I can give you a ride in my car. We are having a movie night in Mark's house and you look like you need a little rest.", Jinyoung decided, ignoring the looks Mark was giving him.

Yugyeom seemed startled, and Jinyoung was sure the boy would refuse when his face tightened up. He didn't know the boy, but he knew how much Mark worried about him, and the kid wasn't ok. But he was sure a talk in the middle of his workplace wasn't going to do either of them any good. So he turned to Mark, giving him a look that said "Let the boy for now, later you two talk at home", and Mark sighed, glancing at Yugyeom.

"Alright, Gyeomie... Will you come home with us? There's going to have free food and everything, and the guys are nice... It's going to be fun".

Yugyeom stared at Mark for a moment, and then he nodded his head. Jinyoung was relieved, and ordered some coffee and the omelet, ushering Mark to sit down. The older kept checking on Yugyeom, worry painted all over his face. But Jinyoung tried smiling and lightening up; it was better to resolve whatever happened behind closed doors, and Jackson was able to cheer anyone up. He didn't know if Jaebum would want to meet him, but they all needed to talk.

It was time Yugyeom had some friends, Mark thought to himself, and that's why he decided to introduce Jinyoung first, because the boy was serious and kind, and Yugyeom could use a little taking care of sometimes, so Mark was expecting the boy to look after Yugyeom when he couldn't. He was thankful for Jinyoung calm personality right now, because he couldn't think straight when he saw Yugyeom so sad. But yeah, it was better to talk after a sweet drink at home, where they could take their time. Maybe Yugyeom would befriend the other guys, and he needed to have more people in his life. So he sent a text in the group chat when Jinyoung seated in front of him.

 

GOT6 squad

**markie**

hey, movie night at my house tonight

bring the booze

**prdsdef.**

i don wanna see jackson

**pepi_jy**

Stop being a child, you need to talk.

**prdsdef.**

don fucking talk to me like that, you know what this traitor did

**jaejae**

Hello, hyungs! I don't know what happened but some beer always help!

I'll go!

**markie**

i'm inviting everyone and Jaebum-ah

friendship is more important then some guy, right?

**prdsdef.**

fuck you

what kind of friend sleeps with the person I like?

**kingwang**

I'm sorry...

**markie**

yah, stop

JB, you better come or I'll kick your ass

**pepi_jy**

Oh, right, Mark's misterious little brother is going to be there

**jaejae**

WHAT??!!?!?

**kingwang**

Oh my fucking god

**prdsdef.**

ok, i'm goin

**markie**

you all are so stupid

 **prdsdef.**

im not forgiving jackson, but i offer a truce for now

mark hid this boy for so long i don believe he's real

**markie**

if any of you say or do something to him

you're all dead

**kingwang**

I accept the truce... Let's talk over some beers

**prdsdef.**

nee, alright. i'm not all that pissed, he wasn't dating me 

but i might punh you

punch*

**markie**

don't wreck my house, Yugy isn't happy right now

 

 

Jaebum read the last text from Mark, and his eyes shot up. He never made the connection, but how many Yugyeoms could there be in Korea? Why he never thought Mark's little brother was the Yugyeom he was head over heels in love for two years?

  
He forced his mind to stop, because no, impossible. That didn't help his anxiety.


	8. Obsession

Jackson fumbled with his car keys whilst still looking at Jaebum, who was fuming, walking towards him. He certainly had found out about the whole sex thing with Yugyeom, and after shouting and almost kicking him, Jaebum went home and promised to never look Jackson in the face again. The chinese wasn't going to complain, he felt really bad about all the situation, and was feeling pretty guilty before this mess, but the tingling in his chest was still there when he looked at Yugyeom. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was two years ago that Jackson Wang met Kim Yugyeom, the freshman. Jackson remembered seeing him in the freshman reception, listening eagerly and diligently taking notes of everything the teachers said during the presentation. Jackson could easily discern him from the crowd, because the kid was taller than anyone, and had sharp features, even if at the same time had a kind of soft demeanor. Yugyeom had black, wavy hair and cute moles coloring his face near his mouth, though he tried to hide it with make up, letting only the cute point just below his right eye appear. He generally dressed neatly, sometimes using leather jackets, sometimes fluffy sweaters. He was very handsome, Jackson firstly thought, and seemed like the serious, hard-working type, someone honest and humble; he maybe towered over everyone in the room, but he didn't look down on anyone. Rather, the kid kept to himself most of the time, reading his notes and bowing to sunbaes that talked about college. He was very late that day, so he couldn't go greet him, and forgot about it afterwards, not knowing what was going to happen just some hours later. He was in this party, just college people in a bar, receiving the new ones with drinks and snacks. It wasn't long before people started gathering and talking loudly, some of the sunbaes already drunk and hitting on the girls, or stumbling around spitting nonsense. Jackson was sorrounded by all kind of girls, telling stories about his fencing adventures and rap skills, stealing woos of admiration and flirty comments. Jackson liked the feeling of being loved, being in the center. Since very young he was a seeker for attention and when he was obliged, oh, he had the time of his life. He was someone who was proud to tell others his love was for everyone equally, and he didn't belong to anyone, but that was a lie. For some time now, he was in love with his best friend: Im Jaebum.

His crush was no secret to anyone who could see the clear signs. Jackson was unusually bashful and used to titillate with sexual jokes that made Jaebum uncomfortable, all the while looking hurt whenever his friend was making out with some girl, like he was resigned to this fate. But then, imagine his surprise when he walked up to Jaebum and the tall handsome freshman kid grinding their crotchs together in the middle of the street, eating each other out shamelessly and moaning for everyone to hear? Jackson was honestly blown away by the realisation that his very hetero best friend was actually kissing this sassy kid he just met. He couldn't stop thinking that maybe there was something about this Yugyeom kid that was very dangerous; more then his sweet high-pitched moans, bold comebacks and pearl white inviting body. Something that was unseen and unheard of before. But maybe he was overthinking all of that to make himself feel better, and actually Jaebum just wanted to really punish this kid someway, even if that meant slipping his tongue inside the other's mouth while panting and being hard.

Jaebum was a hot mess back then, avoiding the matter as if wishing Jackson would forget about it so they could pretend that whole ordeal never happened. Jackson kept seeing for the next days after the  _incident_ Jaebum trying and failing to have sex countless times with mutiple girls, all formats and sizes, like a crazy maniac trying to relive his dick. Everything about it was wrong and in the end all of Jaebum's friends tried to make him stop, until the guy himself gave up. The day Jaebum decided to tell the group he was in fact really gay for this one guy, Mark couldn't stop holding his stomach and cracking up, laugh yelling until he ended up falling on the couch and spanking Jinyoung. Youngjae pitifully pat Jaebum's back, saying things were going to be fine and glaring at Jinyoung who was trying to hide his smirk. Jackson was in the back, leaning against the wall of Mark's rundown house. 

 

"So like, you made out with this random dude at this party and now you're completely head over heels for him? Jaebum-ah, you know this is the most cliched romcom thing ever, right?", Mark asked, still wiping his tears and breathing hard.

 

"Look, I'm not telling you shitheads this for your own amusement! I can't feel anything when I tried having sex with those chicks! My dick didn't go up, alright? This is fucking ridiculous and I hate it, so I'm gonna fucking kiss that kid again and get it over with. Maybe after some terrible experience when I actually see him naked I'll get a grip on reality", Jaebum spat with disgust. 

"Look, hyung, I really think you should just talk to him and explain the situation, if he starts liking you for real, he might get hurt if you realize you can't be in a relationship with men", Youngjae said with his soothing voice, as always the mature one trying to solve the problems.

"I don't give a fuck if he ends up liking me or some shit! That is fucking disgusting and I hate having this feelings. I'm sure it's just because I was drunk and can't get over it until I face him with a sober mind. That punk is fucking annoying, I don't want to have anything to do with him.", Jaebum said with such a definite voice nobody dared to say anything back, even though he was acting like an asshole.

"So, what is this guy's name anyways?", Jinyoung asked, crossing his legs and opening Instagram in his cellphone, "Let's have a look on this hunk that caught the cold heart of Jaebum-hyung .", Jinyoung added, looking the most amused out of all of them.

"The same as Mark's brother, I think. Yugyeom. Don't know how it writes", Jaebum whispered, pinching his nose in frustration and finally plopped face down on the couch.

In that moment, nobody really paid attention to the obvious fact they faced: that Mark's brother Yugyeom was a freshman in the same college Jaebum went to and that - really - there aren't many people around with this name. Maybe their minds were for a few moments malfunctioning, maybe it was collective hysteria, maybe aliens wiped their memories of this very much captain obvious realization. Why in the world Jaebum never made the connection?

The thing is: Jackson knew. Not in that specific moment when he learned the boy's name. Not after Mark told them about his little brother going to the same college, but when he saw Yugyeom again, one week later, studying in the corridor, trying to fit all his books and textbooks inside his backpack. The younger was clumsily holding his phone with the two free fingers he had left, awkwardly holding one big book about interior design. Jackson was walking towards him, suddenly filled with need to clarify this obscure doubt he had in his mind for a while. But when he actually got close enough to talk to Yugyeom, the phone the boy was holding slipped and fell to the ground unlocked, and when Jackson crouched down to catch it, he lost all his words. The wallpaper in his phone was a picture of him and Mark, Yugyeom smiling happily at the camera while Mark was with his mouth wide open as if going to bite the other's cheek. The image was so pure and bright, showing how much those two loved each other, that Jackson couldn't ask. He couldn't bear to think this clumsy and loving kid was going to have his heart broken by Jaebum. Jackson loved him, so he knew better than anyone how cruel Jaebum could be, how ruthlessly he treated gays whom approached him, and this thoughts made him stop dead in his tracks, open a bright smile and return the phone to Yugyeom, using his mellow voice to ligh-heartedly say he should be more careful, and that those books seemed heavy. That was when Jackson decided to protect Mark's little brother, so that he would never think of dating Jaebum, because Jackson was too good of a person to see how things would end if he didn't do something. But what he didn't kow at the time, was that he was going to actually start liking the kid, even if Jaebum was in his mind. This strange feeling of obligation for liking Jaebum for so long and having to see his friend after Yugyeom all this time, maybe it made him resigned to love, to conquest. Yugyeom didn't know them, didn't know their group, and Mark was so busy with Jinyoung and work, and everything was a mess.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jaebum felt like shit. He knew Jackson's shenanigans tendencies even before he accepted he was gay or that Yugyeom was the love of his life. Jaebum knew he didn't feel like this from the start. To be very honest, in the beggining, he couldn't care less about Yugyeom himself, his obsession smacked from strange infatuation; he just never saw someone like him, who could answer back without fear. And there was... Something about his eyes, something that told Jaebum that Yugyeom was strong, he was a survivor. And this fire slapped his senses like nothing ever did, and he thought Yugyeom was beautiful, like a holy creature he never had laid eyes upon. When he actually tasted his lips that first day, he could feel it: fruity flavor, coming from the orange flavored whisky the boy was drinking before; smooth and pale skin that was so easily painted with a rosy blush, as if he was a easel just waiting to be marked.; his uneven, mysterious eyes, hiding from the world all the hardships he must have endured; his cute moles that resembled stars; his high nose and cheekbones; his nose scrunch. All of these little things Jaebum noticed, just looking at Yugyeom, following him with his eyes as if magically attracted to him, like a magnet, his desire to feel his body and warmth against him again, skin on skin, their sweet scent enveloped around them to the point he was intoxicated.

Jaebum knew he wasn't anything to Yugyeom, and thinking back now, when he looked at his phone and re-read the texts from their chat group over and over ad nauseam, he realized it wasn't until he invited Yugyeom to watch movies with him that he actually tried to convey to the younger how he felt, who he was, and why he liked him. They never had time to know each other, to talk, to learn and to fall in love gradually. Jaebum never gave them this chance. Really, he didn't even act in a way that could suggest the remotely slim chance to prove his feelings were genuine. Yugyeom probably thought Jaebum's supposed love was just a crush that got way out of hand, and frankly, he was right to think so. Jaebum started to hate himself for a moment, while reviving all those precious moments he learnt about Yugyeom and never showed him, how undeveloped and muddy his feelings were from out of his perspective, resulting in a scenario which his love wasn't clear. He just - for a fucking lot of two years time - told Yugyeom repeatedly how much he loves him without ever showing it. Of course Yugyeom wasn't going to believe him. And when he finally seemed willing to give him a chance, when Jaebum stopped being fucking stupid and invited him out on a proper date, he went and kissed him. Jaebum may have in the beggining wanted Yugyeom's body, but now he wanted his heart too, and he was so desperate for the younger to know the sincerity of his feelings that he suffocated him. 

But what was worst was the fact that Jaebum knew Yugyeom had a painful past, an abusive ex-lover, and for the way Mark talked sometimes, his life wasn't easy, or healthy. It was a mystery really how Yugyeom was still studying. He could have brooded, he could have lost his temper, he could have shown ANY sign that he was desperately trying to hold back from his hardships - but nothing. And remebering the way he, Jaebum acted: hot-headed, jealous, forceful and how he pounded his feelings in the other's face everytime he saw him, he just definitely knew he was the most injust, selfish and ridiculous person on this goddamned world. Not a surprise how his actions led to Yugyeom hating him. Maybe he wasn't that different from the crazy psychopath bastard that dated Yugyeom after all. No, he was going to do this right this time, he felt like that was his last chance. He would cherish Yugyeom, take care of him, be supportive and help with everything he could to make the younger life easier and happier. Yugyeom was so dear to Jaebum, he needed to express that; Jaebum never felt more hurt then when he saw Yugyeom cry. For his dearest person, he must change for good.

And his plan started in Mark's house that day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I'm kind of in the middle of moving out of my house and filled with college work, so I don't know when I'll post this fic's chapters, bit will try to do it at least once a month! Hope you like this chapter!


	9. Mark's actual baby

Now that Jaebum discovered - very painfully - that his Yugyeom was Mark's little brother Yugyeom, he kept thinking about terrible things and terrible outcomes of this meeting in his friend's house. Mark always was very overprotective, and because their group usually did questionable things like smoking and drinking and going to bars (actually that one was most Jackson), Yugyeom never was introduced to anyone, though Mark would talk about him sometimes. Well, for starters, Jaebum was majoring in a different course than Yugyeom and frankly didn't quite remember what freshman party they met, because at that time he used to go to all of them. It was a very hard time for the group, due to the internalized homophobia going on in Jaebum's part; maybe he always knew he felt attracted to men, in some level of his subconscious. Mark and Jinyoung were way more timid and reserved back then, Jinyoung was serious and strict with studies and Mark barely opened his mouth, so Jaebum coming out really was a good thing for everyone.

Not that it mattered now, when Jaebum thought about how Mark was going to beat him up after the discovery of Yugyeom's true identity. Jaebum still held a little bit of hope of being wrong, but everything he knew about both Yugyeoms was enough to see the connection between the two. Another sigh later, Jaebum planned the conversation and decided to confront his fears. Nothing could go more wrong than it was already, and that pessimistc thought conforted him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jinyoung was enjoying his omelet and looking with his peripherical vision the anxious expression colored in Mark's face. Yugyeom did look very pale, and even if Jinyoung hadn't met the kid till that day, he felt his maternal instincts awake when the boy looked just about ready to collapse. Jinyoung studied the younger's face, noting how professional he was when costumers arrived, his hands that stopped shaking to make the drinks, his polite smile and soft voice. Upon closer inspection, Kim Yugyeom was just a kid that grew up to be ridiculously tall, and Jinyoung immediately understood why Mark was so possessive and worried about his well being. He would like to keep him safe, but right now he didn't know what was happening, and going home to Mark's house and talk might be good for them both. So Jinyoung very discreetely laid his hand above Mark's bony one, squeezing confortingly, and nod his head when Mark looked at him, giving him a soft smile that seemed calmer.

 

"Is Yugyeom overworking himself?", Jinyoung asked quietly, giving Mark the chance to ignore what he said if he wanted to. 

 

Mark moved his eyes to the counter and sighed, retreating his hand from under Jinyoung's to lightly squeeze the steaming hot coffee mug. He opened his mouth just to close it again, and lowered his face to look the dark liquid swaying in front of him. He took a sip, just a little, feeling the bitter taste awake his senses, and finally looked Jinyoung in the face again.

 

"He is always overworking himself", he muttered in a tired voice, "it doesn't matter how much I say I'll help pay for his studies, he always refuses. Yugyeom doesn't like owing people, even if it he gets sick for lack of sleep. He barely has time to sit and eat a proper meal, he can't really cook for himself and doesn't have enough money to buy healthier foods, so he always ends up like that", Mark explained with a worried expression, gritting his teeth in frustration "his parents can't help him, and he refuses help, anyway. But I'm scared he might pass out and end up in a hospital".

 

Jinyoung considered what he just learned, looking at the tall boy still diligently working despite his sickly pale face. He looked so much more older than his age. He had this fatigued complexion that made him look a lot smaller and fragile, like someone who suffered a great deal and just faced it with no other choice. Jinyoung started to rethink his own life, how things were relatively easy to him; he never had to worry about paying his college fees nor about food and seeing the polite smile Yugyeom gave each costumer, independent of how he must be feeling exausted, Jinyoung thought he wanted to help him, even if just to see a genuine and happy smile. He just caught himself thinking that, when he heard Mark chuckling with fond eyes at him. 

 

"You're thinking you want to protect Yugyeom, aren't you?", he took another sip of his coffee, like he already knew the answer. Jinyoung blushed lightly for being so easy to read, but Mark shook his head slowly when the other averted his eyes shyly, "this is how I feel. He might be kind of a spoiled brat sometimes, and whines a lot, but Yugyeom is a lovely and sweet person, he always was, since he was a child. He inspire protectiveness in people.", Mark nodded towards the younger, who was bowing after some costumers left. The youngest noticed he was being watched and looked at their table, locking eyes with Jinyoung, and after hesitating unsurely, waved his fingers in a chaste and timid hello. Jinyoung couldn't help the smile that came up in his face, seeing how awkward Yugyeom was, and he immediately understood that feeling Mark was talking about.

 

 

Jinyoung's car was in the university parking lot, and the walk there was very quick. He walked two steps ahead, letting Mark and Yugyeom have a moment just for them, Mark hogging the younger's arm tightly to his chest, caressing his hand in circles and whispering something in the younger's ear. After a moment of walking, they got in the car - Yugyeom politely said "excuse me" and then asked persmission to open the window a little bit - and Jinyoung drove them to the near supermarket to buy some beers and chocolate shake for Yugyeom, since the younger said he didn't want anything, but was eyeing the ice cream shop while they waited in line like some kid. Mark kept nagging Yugyeom to eat properly and said something about Jinyoung's fried rice being delicious, what Jinyoung thought was a very exaggerated lie, but he didn't said anything back when he saw the twinkle in Yugyeom's eyes, and after sighing with a sulky expression, he agreed to cook for them when they went to Mark's house. 

 

While Jinyoung was busy prepping food, cutting things away with surprisingly fast speed, Mark and Yugyeom were huddled together in the couch, Mark petting Yugyeom's wavy black hair as if to lul him to sleep. It wasn't long before you could hear soft snores and wheezing breaths from the younger, since his throat seemed to be sore. Mark looked up to Jinyoung, who came to offer him a cup of freshly brewed tea, and a small smile. 

 

"Did he sleep?", Jinyoung asked in a murmur, looking to the sleeping boy in Mark's arms.

 

"Yes, but he insisted on being awake to eat your food", Mark answered with a smile, looking fondly at Yugyeom, "he is very stubborn and wanted to thank you for cooking for him", Mark paused for a bit, unsure if he should keep talking, and then drank his warm tea and continued slowly, "Yugyeom seems to be stressed about a guy... He never touched this subject with me before, so I'm worried he is being abused again".

 

Jinyoung took in a breath and sat besides Mark, putting a conforting hand in his shoulder while caressing him slowly, "Maybe you could convince Yugyeom to stay with you for a bit, or if you want me to, I can talk to Jaebum or Jackson to keep an eye on him. They go to the same college, so during breaks he can hang out with them to avoid this guy", Jinyoung suggested gently and smiled when he saw Yugyeom snuggling towards Mark's lap.

 

"Maybe it is a good idea... I planned to introduce Yugyeom to the group only when he was of age, and now that he is... I feel like he doesn't need me to protect him anymore", Mark sighed and drank from his mug again, "not like he ever needed".

 

"You are too overprotective, hyung"

 

"Yes, but Yugyeom doesn't stand up for himself against older people. He just accepts their words quietly and ends up going with the flow. Because of that, I didn't want him to start smoking and drinking. He needs to concentrate in his studies and his health", Mark gave back the mug to Jinyoung, who promptly took and washed it in the kitchen, finishing the fried rice, simple salad and sausages he prepared. 

   
He thought about Mark's words and decided he should talk to the others before they met, so they wouldn't overwhelm the younger. Putting the food nicely in the mismatched plates, he went to get Yugyeom and Mark, who was waking the other with a hug and poking his cheek. 

 

When Yugyeom opened his eyes, he looked startled and immediately apologized to Jinyoung, saying he was very thankful for the meal, to what Jinyoung answered with a fond smile and ruffling the youngest hair. 

 

Their time eating was very calm and gentle, and Jinyoung started to learn a lot of things about Yugyeom. He wasn't as cute as he first thought, because he soon revealed his whiny persona just as Mark started talking about college. 

 

"And this teacher was like 'I need this assignment next week, I won't accept it otherwise' and then when I sent it to him, he told me he couldn't grade it before the vacations! How unfair is that? I tried very hard to finish it on time, and I need to know my grades because of the scholarship! Really, he was gone in some fancy beach the next time I checked his Facebook!", the boy said angrily and ignored Mark's words when he advised Yugyeom to go the collegiate and see if they could do something "I shouldn't have to do that! It's his work! I don't say to my costumers to wait for their coffe until I get out of my break!"

 

And it continued like that for at least fifteen minutes, until Mark got tired and snapped at Yugyeom to stop being a brat. Yugyeom just harrumphed displeased and grumbled throughout the rest of the meal. So he was kind of spoiled and didn't like it when older people tried to make him do things or interrupted him in the middle of his sentences. He definitely would have problems with Jaebum, with all his crazy hierarchal mindset. Pouting and whining everytime Mark nagged him, they looked like real brothers, and it was heartwarming, even if Jinyoung was fed up with all the complaints and snappy responses Yugyeom woulg give him. What could he say, they apparently liked teasing each other. 

 

After they finished their meal, Jinyoung excused himself, saying he was going to the bathroom when Yugyeom went to wash the dishes with a pouty face,after losing in rock paper and scissors against a very pleased Mark who kept on laughing while being spread out in the couch. Jinyoung smirked when Yugyeom started his whining and received back a stick of tongue from the younger boy. 

 

Jinyoung thought about how to write that message without getting the oppposite reaction he needed. Not ovewhelming. Which was difficult with their loud group.

 

  **pepi_Jy**

Hey, so, if you all could calm the fuck down before coming here

We are going to drink, but Mark's little brother isn't drinking and isn't in a very good day

**jaejae**

Awn... Is he alright? :(

I can get some ice cream on my way

**pepi_jy**

No, is better not to spoil the kid

**jaejae**

what  
????

**pepi_jy**

Nothing.

**markie**

hey you, watch what you say about my baby

**pepi_jy**

He really is a baby though, you cuddled him too much

**markie**

shut up

**kingwang**

I kinda have something, maybe I won't be able to go...

**jaejae**

Awwn come on jack! How long has it been since we all went out?

Let's gooooo T-T

**prsdef.**

You better get your ass in there as soon as I arrive Jackson

**kingwang**

Okay...

**pepi_jy**

Did you listen to me?

**jaejae**

Yes, yes, not straying the baby from his righteous path~

**markie**

that's right

**pepi_jy**

Does he know you talk about him as if he was an actual baby?

**markie**

shut up you bitch.

**pepi_jy**

Make me.

**prsdef.**

get a fuckin' room

 

Jaebum answered the phone, and later his head was spinning just thinking about Jackson and Yugyeom in the same room. Now he needed to control himself. And that wasn't going to be easy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it my dudes. Sorry for the late chapter and because this is more a filler than anything, but I want to construct their relationship slowly.
> 
> Ok, hope you like it!!


	10. It's good to be back

Jaebum had bought two boxes of cheap beer, the cheapest he could find; one that would make him so drunk to the point he would forget about Yugyeom and Jackson while talking to the youngest. He couldn't fuck this up now, he couldn't and wouldn't have a jealous rage and fight with everyone in Mark's house. At least, that was what he was repeating to himself like a mantra in the way to his friend's house. He didn't know if Yugyeom was really Yugyeom. But he must be, right? Oh, please, no. Maybe there are two Yugyeoms in the same department, maybe he was crazy. Fuck.

In that same instant Jaebum was walking towards Mark's house, Jackson Wang was staring at his own reflexion in his car's dark glass. He had known Yugyeom's true identity for two years, and concealed this fact from Mark and Jaebum, in the hopes of no one ever finding out. Now, he didn't know what Yugyeom's reaction would be, since the younger had been avoiding him since their catastrophic nightstand. Well, he wouldn't blame the younger: Jackson was so nervous he didn't know how to act and everything was so embarrassing he just wanted to die. But the true is he really wanted to protect his secret, if not for him, for Yugyeom. But that didn't matter, Jaebum was going to go even if he tried to talk his way out of this one; this wasn't the first time Jaebum almost came across Mark's little brother, his forever crush Yugyeom. Time and time again, when Mark came to visit Yugyeom in college or went to have lunch or coffee with him in the cafe the younger worked, Jackson had to drag Jaebum away with some kind of nebulous excuse. It worked the majority of time, but it was close and he was positive that today he wouldn't be able to prevent things from happening, and he was so sorry. Kim Yugyeom grew up to be his baby, and he loved the youngest just as fiercely as Mark - he wanted to protect him from heartbreak at any cost - especially since he was in love with Jaebum. But was he really? Sometimes Jackson didn't think so. He started to think that maybe his love was there just slightly, when Jaebum would be goofy and give him a warm hug here and there, or when he was drunk and told him how he was important to him. But those were just flicks of his previous obsessed love; the love he developed for the younger was so much purer, honest and real. It didn't hurt him, nor caused him the frenetic pain and scorching desire: he just wanted to protect Yugyeom from all the bad things in the world, not minding if he was doing it behind everyone's back. 

But that didn't matter now; he was rushing towards Mark's house in his car, clutching the steering wheel with so much force his knuckles were white. He knew Jaebum changed, but he feared the worst; he also knew his friend so much better than he admitted to himself. Jaebum was a good person, calm and sincere and very thoughtful when he wanted, but he still was a jealous, possessive person, and if he got violent with Yugyeom, Jackson feared so much that it would trigger the younger's memories of his ex. He couldn't sit still any longer while his thoughts raced in his head, so Jackson pulled over the car and grabbed his phone.

 

**kingwang**

Jaebum, I need to talk to you

come see me before you go to Mark's

**prsdef.**

what the fuck do u want?

i'm not gonna forgive you so soon, but don't worry, i don't plan on fighting you there

**kingwang**

that's not it

it's abt Yugyeom

**prsdef.**

what about Yugyeom? 

who are u talking about? Mark's brother or Yugyeom from college?

**kingwang**

that's what I want to talk abt

Please.

**prsdef.**

so i'm right ain't i?

Yugyeom is the same person

i fucking knew it

i guess i always knew, i just didn't want to see 

**kingwang**

Jaebum, promise me you won't do anything to him. It's not his fault

**prsdef.**

what's not his fault?

that you two fucked?

so are you saying you raped him?

**kingwang**

God no!NO!

I'm just saying he didn't start

**prsdef.**

but he went with you willingly

and it's my fucking fault

look, i'm not gonna do anything

i fucking love him, ok?

and i will tell him that properly, even if he chooses you

**kingwang**

he won't choose me Jaebum, he won't. 

And I love someone else.

 

To that, Jaebum didn't respond. He stopped by a glass work shop and was struck by his own reflection: he looked absolutely defeated. He always had this inkling that Yugyeom belonged to someone else. He could feel every time he caught Yugyeom with his blank eyes, staring, distant, zoned out. They were standing too far apart, and Jaebum couldn't reach him; they were way too different and those differences stopped them from having a proper conversation. 

He continued on his way though, because the shop clerk was looking at him with a strange look and because the beer was heavy. All these thoughts didn't matter and Jaebum wasn't really the type to think much before he did things - he was best at acting up. 

He already promised himself he would be honest and tell Yugyeom about his feelings and perhaps Yugyeom wouldn't believe him, but he needed to try. And when he arrived at Mark's, the very first thing he saw was Yugyeom: he was by the window in the kitchen, with his sweater pushed up all the way to his elbows, laughing so fully his eyes crinkled, and his nose scrunched up in that cute way, and Jaebum's heart clenched so tightly; he felt ticklish and so very happy, his mouth curled up in a joyful smile. He loved seeing Yugyeom smile, smile in that beautiful way, as if he could beat the sun... He never smiled like that in his presence.

 

Yugyeom was finishing the dishes; he took his sweet time to wash just to be petty. Jinyoung was texting someone on the phone with Mark hugging him from behind, saying him what to write next. Yugyeom found himself feeling happy from watching their interaction. Mark's eyes were visibly shining while looking at Jinyoung, and Yugyeom never saw Mark being so touchy and the older even spoke cutely, and he made a gag sound for them, and Jinyoung clicked his tongue at him with a motherly look, and Yugyeom laughed so hard his tummy hurt. In the end, his hands were wet and he shook the droplets in his hyungs, gaining an annoyed noise from Jinyoung and a loud cackle from Mark. And then the doorbell. 

Yugyeom went to the door still smiling, holding his chest to breath properly, hearing Mark tell him he should let the boys enter with their drinks. So he opened the door and suddenly the floor disappeared under his feet. Jaebum looked back at him, a tense look in his face and a strained smile painting his features. He still was as handsome as ever, with a loose band shirt and even looser pants, and a horrendous looking fisherman hat. Yugyeom was distracted for a while, he just stood there looking bewildered, his legs threatening to wobble. 

 "Gyeommie, who is it?", he heard Mark call from behind him who then hung himself around Yugyeom's back, looking at the visitor. "Oh, Jaebummie! It took you long enough! Let me introduce you two. Gyeommie, this is Jaebum-ah, your hyung, he studies in your university together with Jackson who is also coming. But he studies music, so I don't know if you saw him in your department", Mark explained taking the box of beer from Jaebum's hands "why are you standing there like a statue? Come on in! Jinyoung-ah is already here!", the oldest said with a lazy smile and walked back inside, yelling about finally getting their booze. 

"Hey, Yugyeom...", Jaebum said in a breathy voice, like he was holding his breath before, "I, ahn, I need to talk-"

"YAH! What are you two doing over there? Close the fucking door, it's cold as shit!", Mark yelled, and it startled both Jaebum and Yugyeom, and Yugyeom just blinked quickly to wake up and walked briskly towards Mark and Jinyoung, as if seeking protection. Jaebum felt his heart break again. 

Yugyeom looked at Jaebum with the corner of his eyes, feeling his heartbeat just skyrocket. He wasn't ready to see him. And then it downed on him that Jackson was also coming and he almost laughed of this fucked coincidence. But... What if it wasn't? 

He opened his eyes wide when the thought crossed him: these were Mark's best friends and for the way Mark spoke so freely, slang and all, he knew they were very, very close. So they must know about him, about his past. His blood went cold; he felt all his muscles stiffen in quiet realization. Jaebum knew him all along so was he just pretending? Was he playing a game? Was this a bet to see who would claim him first? Mark was always so set in presenting his friends to him, was this because of that? But then why Mark looked so clueless? He wouldn't do that to him, would he? No, Mark wasn't like that. But maybe he wanted to be accepted in their group and-

"Gyeom? Are you alright?"

He looked up and met eyes with Jinyoung's concerned face. He asked in a whisper, checking if the other two were listening. Mark was unwrapping the beer and talking with Jaebum about something, but the other looked like he was far away with a constrained expression. 

"Do you know Jaebum-hyung?", Jinyoung then asked, feeling all his bristles crawl with a foreboding answer. 

And Yugyeom didn't know why, but he felt like he could trust Jinyoung, so his head waved a weak yes, and he immediately bowed his head as if ashamed of admitting it. 

"Yeah, yeah, I know him"

And they both knew he didn't just "knew" him. Jinyoung felt a cold sweat descend his back and an uncomfortable twist in his stomach. Fuck. Yugyeom. YUGYEOM. Y.U.G.Y.E.O.M. Jaebum's Yugyeom, the guy he was crushing on for forever.

"Do you want to go upstairs? You can sleep and I'll tell them you're feeling sick", he proposed quietly, feeling the tension just increase by the minute. Yugyeom chanced a look at Jaebum and when their eyes met he automatically clung to Jinyoung's arm, feeling weak.

"Okay, we're getting out of here", Jinyoung started saying, but then Mark hugged him from behind.

"What's the matter? You two are whispering for a while", he said, voice still, and looked towards Yugyeom "Gyeommie?".

But Yugyeom couldn't crush Mark's night like that. He knew how much the older worked to gain his money and he also knew how much he struggled for being so quiet; he couldn't cause trouble for Mark. He knew he would end his friendship with the guys if he knew, and Yugyeom just couldn't stand to do that with him. He was so free and at ease right now. 

"It's alright, hyung! I just felt light on my feet for a moment, it's okay", Yugyeom interrupted what Jinyoung was about to say, and the older looked at him full of uncertainty, "it's alright, really", he repeated, this time looking at Jinyoung, "I'll just go upstairs for a moment, I need to wash my face", he said trying to sound cheerful and Mark seemed to buy it. 

"Okay, but if you're not feeling well I'm taking you to the hospital, ok?", he said with a pinch of worry in his voice.

"Don't worry, mom, I'm fine", Yugyeom said with a bratty voice so Mark would give up. 

When his hyung ruffled his hair and went back to the beers, he noticed Jaebum was looking at him. He seemed hesitant, as if balancing his options. Yugyeom again gave Jinyoung a tired smile and went hopping two steps at a time in the stairs. He wanted to run, he wanted to escape from there and hide behind his fluffy blankets at home. This was the worst and soon enough Mark would get on that he was faking his smile. But he was so smitten with Jinyoung and so happy to be around friends. Yugyeom never saw him so comfortable around people. His thoughts raced, he felt dizzy. The bathroom door was ajar and he could see the tip of the toilet bowl - he wanted to throw up. He felt all the food he had earlier crawling up his throat. He jogged and fell on his knees just in time to get out of his system all the food and hurt and disgust he was holding for the past three days. He wanted to hate Jaebum, but he knew he didn't. Jaebum was just an excuse to mop around feeling sorry for himself because of his ex, and see Jaebum almost everyday reminded him of his powerlessness. He was disgusted with himself, he couldn't see his own reflection in the dirty sanitary water. But what disgusted him more was his need: he wanted someone to help him right now, to hold him preciously and take care of him. He was so concentrated in feeling miserable that he didn't hear Jaebum coming with hurried steps. 

"Yugyeom!", he all but ran when he saw the younger crouched down on the toilet and went to his side, rubbing a hand gently in Yugyeom's back "It's alright...", he repeated when he vomited again. 

Yugyeom didn't reply. He was thinking a lot of things and just felt nauseous again. Of course Jaebum went to him as soon as he ran away, he always did. It didn't matter how much he mistreated the older, Jaebum took care of him every time. They knew each other for so long, but at the same time, not long enough. He didn't know Jaebum except for a few things he gathered through the years. But no matter what, he was always there when Yugyeom had no one. The memories came hooping back: Jaebum giving him band-aids when he cut his fingers (now he knew why Jaebum always carries around band-aids, because of his cats); that time when he was feeling sick with the beginnings of a cold and Jaebum came to him in the university's library with a bag full of energy drinks, vitamins and cold medicine; when he was feeling feverish and found a note from Jaebum with a box of cooling pads sitting in his desk; when he fell and twisted his ankle and Jaebum insisted on taking his things and bring him to the infirmary.   
Yugyeom started to cry. 

"No, no, why are you crying? Your stomach is hurting?", Jaebum asked with a soft tone and looked so worried as though Yugyeom was dying "I'm going to fetch Mark, ok? And then you are going to he hospital", he said, already getting up. Yugyeom felt suddenly cold, what with Jaebum's body heat fading too fast when he moved, and the youngest whined pitifully and clung to Jaebum, holding his arms tightly. 

"Don't go...", he managed to spurt out, hearing that blaring ringing in his head "Stay with me...", he pleaded weakly and he could feel all Jaebum's muscles tense, but then he crouched down again with a soft smile.

"Okay, I'm not going anywhere", he promised, manhandling Yugyeom into a sitting position and taking off his bangs from his sweaty face, so Yugyeom could bow his head and gag a little. He waited patiently until Yugyeom finished and grabbed the towel to dry his face and nape with light pats "Are you feeling better?"

Better was so relative right now. Yugyeom was better, his stomach stopped spinning, but his heart was now warm and his body ticklish. Why was he so hostile towards Jaebum? Why he ever was? 

"Come on, let's wash your face a little. It's better if you take some water and maybe eat something light", Jaebum said, lifting Yugyeom slowly and leading him to the sink. Again he brushed Yugyeom's bangs and like it was totally normal, wet the towel he was previously holding and started to wipe his face delicately. 

Yugyeom kept on staring at him dazed-eyed. The older was being so gentle and careful while taking care of him even after everything he said and did. Maybe Jaebum was a little awkward and ridiculously straightforward with his feelings, but the way he touched Yugyeom so affectionately really showed how he truly felt; and maybe Yugyeom liked that, to be fussed over. 

"Why are you doing this?", Yugyeom let escape, "I treated you like shit"

Jaebum looked at the younger, carefully digesting what he said, and then just shrugged his shoulders with a smile.

"It's not like I treated you any better. So we're even.", he said, but then made a face and narrowed his eyes "but I am your hyung, so I guess you owe me a little", he added with a smile that could be considered cute. Yugyeom laughed a little, and felt compelled to try to ease the mood like the older was doing, but Jaebum interrupted his thoughts when he opened his mouth again, this time with an apologetic tone "I'm sorry, Yugyeom-ah... Hyung has been giving you a hard time, right? I'm sorry I was such an asshole with you before, in that club, and I'm sorry I kept pestering you with my feelings all this time...".

His voice was getting smaller and smaller as he spoke, and he looked solely at the ground. Yugyeom was so flabbergasted he couldn't move nor think for several seconds before a response came naturally.

"It's okay, hyung... I reacted badly and never really gave you a chance."

Jaebum never apologized so directly. He was the type to do little things to compensate others to avoid actually saying the words sorry. Yugyeom very well knew that, he was so accustomed to Jaebum praising him like crazy and being extremely nice and going out of his way to please him when he done something bad Yugyeom started to get annoyed and just ignored him. But now, he was thinking that this was strangely endearing.  Jaebum perhaps was all handsome and full of the hip hop hunk vibe, but inside he was just as insecure as Yugyeom, at least when it came to his feelings. He needed reassurance and comfort, even if he was too prideful to say it out loud. 

"I don't blame you... I wasn't exactly easy to deal with..."

Yugyeom agreed internally. Jaebum made him feel afraid, all with the sharp eyes, piercings and the angry and serious look he used to have all the time. He grew to think he was cold and heartless, but little by little he was seeing Jaebum's true goofy, awkward and caring nature. 

"Yeah, you wasn't. You were creepy as hell", he said with a playful smirk, but Jaebum just shrink in shame, "it's okay, hyung... If you won't do that anymore, we can left it behind us and get on well from now. We are Mark's friends and I want to get on", he said, scooping some water that was falling from the sink and gurgling before spitting out. 

All of Jaebum's hope was smashed in one swift sentence. Yugyeom didn't want him, didn't acknowledge his love. It was too late. 

Yugyeom was looking curiously at Jaebum, who had his shoulders so downcast it was kind of funny. There was this tingling and then his body was overcome with quiet anticipation. And when Jaebum looked at him with a hurt smile, he didn't think before he dipped his face down so he could meet their lips in a sweet and longing kiss. Yugyeom had closed his eyes in order to not blush, so he didn't see Jaebum's wide and full of love eyes. Jaebum was practically swooning; his body felt light as a feather, his blood was so hot he was overheated and his mouth, oh, his mouth was delighted. He couldn't help the big grin that took over his entire face. 

He was so lost in his feelings he took longer to remember how Yugyeom ran away when they kissed in the movies, and his body reacted almost instantly. He held Yugyeom by his hips tightly, afraid of losing this feeling. He missed this so much, how his heart leaped all the way to his throat in anticipation, how his whole body moved naturally to get closer, as if they were magnets. He was hesitant at first, because he thought Yugyeom would pull away or push him, but he didn't. The younger melt in the kiss, letting out a soft whimper when Jaebum teased his mouth with his tongue, asking for a silent permission. And Yugyeom gave it to him. He opened his plump lips just a little, with trembling nervousness, and met Jaebum in quickly needier and stronger kiss. They kissed as if there was nothing holding them back, as if they were born solely for kissing each other. Yugyeom felt hot and cold, and then felt embarrassingly weak and just pressed shamefully against Jaebum, clutching the other's shirt so tightly Jaebum grunted lowly, his voice turning raspier and sultrier. 

Their breaths were so rapid and curt it was loud and their hands were all over the place. No one could deny how much the desire sizzled between them. Suddenly Yugyeom found himself seated in the sink, Jaebum aggressively coming on to him, never disconnecting their mouths, hungrily biting his lips until Yugyeom moaned. The younger trapped Jaebum between his legs and when their crotches rubbed roughly against each other, both moaned in equal needy voices. Yugyeom was so hard, but so as Jaebum as they grinded slow and dirty. Jaebum's hands were starting to make their way up under Yugyeom's sweater when a knock resounded in the room, and they looked alarmed at the door. 

Jaebum was frozen like a statue, so Yugyeom answered in the most normal voice he could muster. 

"Yeah?"

"Yugyeom-ah? This is Jinyoung. Are you alright in there? Have you seen Jaebum? He told me he was going to answer a call and disappeared. He's not in there with you, is he?"

Jinyoung was too perspective for his own good, Jaebum thought with a grumble. 

"Ah, no, he's not", Yugyeom lied, he knew Jinyoung wouldn't buy it but he wasn't courageous enough to just flat out admit it.

"Oh, okay", Jinyoung responded, sounding almost mocking "the boys have arrived, so if you feel better, come down to meet them" and soon enough they could hear Jinyoung's footsteps fading. 

"Oh my god", Yugyeom stuttered with a horrified look and disentangled from Jaebum's arms "let's go, oh my god, I'm mortified", he murmured, his face all blushed. 

Jaebum felt regretful when he heard the words, but it didn't look like a rejection, and Yugyeom didn't push him away when he kept his arms firmly around the youngest's hips.

"Let go, hyung, we can't be here, they will found out" he pleaded and when Jaebum smirked devilishly, Yugyeom looked at him as if he was crazy "let go you moron! I don't want to meet Mark's friends looking like this", he pointed to himself and then Jaebum, who seemed much more put together then him "you fucking bastard" he groaned.

"Okay, okay, let's go. I'm sorry. Don't pout", Jaebum grinned and finally let the younger go. 

Yugyeom quickly smoothed his hair and clothes before they went downstairs, Yugyeom escaping the proximity when Jaebum was closing in on him. 

"Stop doing that", Yugyeom yelled whispered and received back an shit-eating grin from the older.

They kept this back and forth till they saw the other all gathered in the middle of the living room, an unhealthy amount of beer in the center table. All the eyes turned towards them, and Yugyeom saw Jinyoung's brow arched in pure judging and a half smirk. 

"Oh, hello, so you are the famous Yugyeom!", Youngjae said, and Yugyeom smiled slightly uncomfortable with all the attention. He already knew Youngjae from the short encounters they had in the cafe, but he didn't knew he and Mark were so close. 

Jackson was in the back, leaning against the wall, and when his eyes met with Yugyeom's, they were so dark and intense the younger crawled near Jaebum unconsciously. And Jackson accompanied his movements, seeming to tense by the younger's reaction. 

Yugyeom avoided his eyes and then finally looked at someone he never met before. It was a tall and rather skinny and bony guy with a striking white hair and flashy clothes. Yugyeom couldn't erase the thought that his style was very exotic with the flower jacket, super skinny black jeans and leather high-heels boots that seemed very expensive. 

"Oh, hello", the guy said when he noticed Yugyeom checking him out. Well, he wasn't exactly checking him out, but the look the guy gave him startle Yugyeom a little. He seemed mischievous and sassy, and when he was going to respond, the guy walked towards him with a big smile and said with his pouty lips "You can call me Bambam. I was away for some time in Thailand where I was born so it's been a while since I saw all the guys. I'm happy to have someone of my age. I hope we get along well, Kim Yugyeom", Bambam said, straightening up Yugyeom's sweater with a knowing look. 

Jaebum immediately frowned with the close proximity. He never was very close to Bambam; they all had known each other when the thai came to Mark's university in a exchange program. The guy didn't really have any respect for his hyungs and he was way to sassy for his own good, with the sexual jokes. And Jaebum could perceive the glint in his eyes when he looked at Yugyeom. 

"Well, what took you so long? We already started drinking!", Mark chirped from where he was seated in the sofa, handing cold beer to Jaebum, who took it and gulped it down looking at Jackson, that kept staring at him with intense eyes. Jaebum almost smirked, but he wasn't sure what was going to happen and Yugyeom was pulled by the thai and they started to chat almost instantly about something, Youngjae excited to have younger people to talk to. Mark looked at the trio with warm eyes and rested his head in Jinyoung's shoulder.

Everything seemed fine, except for the fact that Jackson wouldn't come closer to the group even when Mark complained about his distance. He just smiled and said he wasn't going to stay there longer and didn't want to get swept under all the drinks.

"So, it's been a while and I want to know all the news", Bambam said loudly, waggling his eyebrows at the couple snuggled in the couch "Mark and Jinyoung finally mingled or are they still pretending to not like each other?", he asked, looking around the room for anyone that had the answer to his question. Jinyoung stiffed, drinking a long shot of his beer. He obviously was trying to ignore the conversation.

"Come on, Bam, you know how shy those two are, let's not talk about it", Youngjae answered with a square smile, trying to smooth things when an uncomfortable silence fell in the room.

"Well, and what about Jackson? Is he serious about someone now? I haven't seen any pictures at clubs or with girls in his arms. I guess he finally found the one!", the younger continued and Jackson moved to stand behind him.

"I don't know what you are talking about, Bambs. I'm still very active, I just don't post it so you can stalk me", he said in a joking tone, but with a slight warning in his voice. Jaebum looked at his friend sternly, but otherwise just drank his beer and discretely slid his leg closer until his feet was caressing Yugyeom's calf. The younger looked at him with wide eyes and a warning look, but Jaebum was still holding Jackson's gaze in contemplative victory. This was Jaebum's way to mark his territory and Jackson smiled, though it didn't reach his dark eyes.

 Yugyeom saw this interaction and he felt his chest hurt. He couldn't believe Jaebum was doing that. He hadn't change after all; he was just a prize to show off. Jaebum finally conquered the most difficult boss. He huffed, unbelieving, and moved his leg away to put it above Bambam's. The thai looked intrigued, but then he noticed the tension and smiled in a sadistic way.   

"Well, aren't things interesting...", he shrugged his shoulders, caressing Yugyeom's arm "it's good to be back". 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm sorry for the wait! I've been struggling to write, but kept going when I saw the kudos. Thanks for reading this, I don't thinks this is any good, but I'm happy someone is taking time to read anyways. See you!


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